At The Doctor 2: Electric Boogaloo

Well, folks, the last time we talked I told you I’d wound up in the emergency room dealing with some unknown ailment that seemed like gallbladder issues but was deemed not to be that. Heh. Guess what?

A week and a half later, when I needed to be working, I found myself once again in a doctor’s office with similar issues — and this time, I wound up under the knife so to speak. Now I write to you minus a gallstone-riddled gallbladder after I was determined to have a classic textbook case of gallbladder issues.

Needless to say, I am more than a bit miffed that something, had it been caught in the first place, could have saved me additional discomfort and illness along with missing work. Now, you might say, this might not have been the issue three weeks ago, but my gallstones the size and shape of dice might beg to differ. In fact, the amazing surgeon I had told me my gallbladder was the worst she’d seen in her career. Well, I’ve always said if you can’t be good, be good at it.

But as I’ve had a week on the couch with Netflix binging to recuperate, I realize I feel something different.

I’ve decided I am beginning to resemble one of those U-Pull-It junkyards.

Step right up folks, what are you looking for today? Gallbladder? Sorry you just missed it. Appendix? Oh, we sold that off about 14 years ago. Spleen? Well, she still has one of those. You buy it, I’ll throw in a liver. I know, I know, she’s not in the greatest shape but she should still have a few thousand more miles left in her.

Seriously. Monday marked my third impromptu “emergency” surgery in my adulthood. I am not dumb enough to ask “what’s next” — only because I once was that dumb, and Mr. Murphy smacked me upside the head with his infamous law.

I know I don’t normally make resolutions and I am a bit late to that party. However, I’d like to try to finish out the rest of 2016 with the rest of my organs intact. Is that really too much to ask?

I suppose if I look at this from a positive perspective, I could consider this last round of illness a step towards that losing weight resolution I never officially make and definitely never keep. Go me!


Leave a Reply